I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
Randomize
