I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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