Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
