I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
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