Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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