May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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