Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
