Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Randomize
