shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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