so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
