these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
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