My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Randomize