so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
sarcasm needs its own font
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
