She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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