I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Randomize