i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Randomize
