I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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