What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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