I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
