you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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