Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
Randomize
