I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
