you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
