Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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