i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
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