i think my mom watched the whole time
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
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