Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
Randomize