I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
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