In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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