I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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