1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Randomize