Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
