did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
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