I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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