sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
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