drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Bring me that man meat
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
