The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
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