I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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