dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
