He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
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