Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Randomize
