i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
