Dual....:-)
If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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