summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Randomize
