he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I'm bleeding and have questions
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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