Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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