he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize