She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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