So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize