Me. At least after what I've been through.
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
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