just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Randomize
