Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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